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| In This Issue • Marriage Tip 10: Receive and Give Encouragement • Monthly Marriage Enrichment Group • Other Upcoming Opportunities |
| Marriage Tip 10:
Receive and Give Encouragement The need for encouragement is met by urging another to persist and persevere toward a goal, and by stimulating toward love and good deeds. 1 Thess. 5:11 “Therefore encourage one another and build up one another . . .” Heb. 10:24, 25 “and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds . . . encouraging one another.” Inspire with courage, spirit, or hope, and plant seeds that yield the fruit of love and good deeds. Jesus continually encouraged His disciples and those who were downcast and discouraged. The Pharisees even criticized Jesus because He regularly met with those who were spiritually and emotionally struggling (Matt. 9:12-13). God encourages us by giving abundant life through Jesus (Jn. 10:10) and by promising that He will never leave or forsake us (Heb. 13:5). Scripture is filled with encouraging words like, “Do not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary” (Gal. 6:9). Emphasize the greatness of God. If the Spirit of God that raised Jesus from the dead, dwells in you and your partner, then that same Spirit can resurrect love, forgiveness, self-control, or whatever is needed. That is either true or it isn’t. If it is not true then there is not much hope for any of us. But if true, then you don’t have something God can’t fix. God often allows discouragement because we have a misplaced dependence on our self or others versus Him. Help people discover their spiritual gifts and opportunities to use them. God has given each person a motivational gift (Ro. 12:6ff). When people discover their gift, and use it serving others, they discover something they can do endlessly and somewhat effortlessly. As they see the impact of operating within their niche it propels them to do even more. Praise and affirm positive character qualities privately and publicly. Praising people sincerely for positive character qualities motivates them to continue on. Praise them privately and brag on them in public with words like “I want you to know how much I appreciate . . .” Encourage others in areas of their biggest fears. Fears are what hold most people back from being all they can be. Help them to see what they really fear and then to face their fears. Help to balance exaggerated fears (“it will be fine”). When people fail give comfort first, then, at the appropriate time, encourage them. Most will not receive encouragement until the hurts are comforted. They seem to argue about how bad things are. Often, this is motivated by a need for comfort. Once comforted, people are more open to be encouraged. So help them to see the bright side, and what God may be up to. Also, emphasize things that they did well, and what they did accomplish. How have received and given encouragement? |
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| About Karl Elkins Karl Elkins, LPC, ThM, MA, CSC, BCPCC, DAPA has 25 years of counseling experience and is an Adjunct Instructor at College of Biblical Studies teaching Marriage and Family courses. He is Founder and President of Christway Counseling Center P.C. specializing in marriage and family counseling. He earned a Master’s degree in Theology from Dallas Theological Seminary, and a Master’s degree in Counseling from Colorado Christian University. He was formerly on staff with Intimate Life Ministries and director of a Houston Minirth-Meier New Life Clinic. He is married to Terry Elkins and has two grown children. |
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| Other Upcoming Opportunities Two-Day Marriage Clinic™ The fastest way to marriage harmony! A two-day clinic to learn and experience the 25 Core Relational Life Skills. More Info » Three-Day Accelerated Marriage Counseling (AMC)™ Includes all of the topics, instruction, and counseling projects in the Two-Day Marriage Clinic™, but is completely private—you, your partner and the counselor only. More Info » Individual Counseling We offer individual counseling to couples desiring an introductory session or two, follow-up sessions, or focused counseling. More Info » FREE Marriage Builder Series Don’t just tie the knot, but tighten the knot as you strengthen abilities to incorporate relevant and practical biblical principles in these couples’ group classes. Child care included. First Tuesday of every month (6:30-8:30pm). More Info » Contact Information Phone: (832) 358-0900 E-Mail: terry@christwaycounseling.com Web: www.christwaycounseling.com  |
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