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 • Marriage Tip 5: Receive and Give Affection
 • Monthly Marriage Enrichment Group
 • Other Upcoming Opportunities
Marriage Tip 5: Receive and Give Affection
The need for affection is met by expressing care and closeness through physical touch. It can also include endearing words like “I love you.” Rom. 16:16 “Greet one another with a holy kiss.” Mk. 10:16 “And they were bringing children to him so that He might touch them . . . And He took them in His arms and began blessing them, laying His hands on them.”
Realize God gives affection indirectly vs. directly. Though God may choose to meet many of our needs like comfort, encouragement, and acceptance directly, He chooses to meet physical affection (hugs, sexual affection) indirectly through others. Though others can legitimately meet most needs like attention, encouragement, and comfort, some aspects of affection (sex) should only be met in the context of marriage. This partially explains why sex can be so problematic for couples. If you are not meeting your partner’s need for sexual intimacy it’s a big problem because God won’t do it and no one else should either.
Affection communicates worth and value. Jesus could have just used words to heal others but He showed care and concern by touching a blind man’s eyes (Mk. 8:23), a leper’s skin (Matt. 8:2) and a woman’s hand (Matt. 8:14).
Affection can communicate comfort. When Jesus announced that “one of you will betray me” (Jn. 13:21), John did not try to fix the problem, give advice or pep talks. Gifted in mercy, he simply “reclined on Jesus bosom” (Jn. 13:23) communicating “I care and am here for you.”
Realize your partner may have differing desires for affection. It is often said that women have sex to have love and men just love to have sex. Some women complain that the only time their husband touches them is when they want sex. When men complain their wife is too frigid, she may respond that her husband is just a sex maniac. Realize these differences can increase when one person’s primary love language is affection.
Realize your partner may find it especially hard to give affection. There are many reasons some find it hard to give affection: past sexual abuse, an emotional wall of hurt between couples, not having received much affection growing up, unresolved guilt from past sexual sins that make sex seem dirty or wrong.
Tear down the emotional wall before initiating affection. Like it or not, it is hard to be affectionate (especially for women) when there are unresolved hurts between couples. Women say they feel dirty when offering sexual affection when there is unresolved hurt.
Use cards, notes, letters. If you have a hard time speaking affectionate, endearing words then buy and give cards that express what you feel.
How have you given and received non-sexual affection?
Monthly Marriage Enrichment Group
Monthly Marriage Enrichment GroupSchedule/Register Now

Ongoing Couples’ Accountability Group
The Monthly Marriage Enrichment Group is available to those who have already attended the Two-Day Marriage Clinic™ or the Three-Day Accelerated Marriage Counseling (AMC)™. This ongoing accountability group helps you internalize the good practices you’ve learned, avoid returning to bad habits, and develop new marriage-building skills.
The Monthly Marriage Enrichment Group offers new opportunities for skill development and in-depth review of the 25 Essential Marriage Skills in the context of a caring, confidential group.
This format provides a unique opportunity for questions, support, encouragement, and dealing with problem areas not yet fully resolved. Couples can discuss their issues as much or as little as desired—the only person you must talk with is your spouse.

Thursday evening from 7:30pm to 9:00pm.
 • March 4
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 • June 3
 • July 1
 • August 5
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Courtyard by Marriott Houston Westchase
9975 Westheimer Road
Houston, TX 77042
(713) 784-3003
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$50/couple/meeting. We ask for a six-month minimum commitment. (The total cost for all six meetings is $300/couple). Some health insurance plans cover group counseling. (more insurance information)
Contact Information
Phone: (832) 358-0900
Schedule/Register Now
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About Karl Elkins
Karl Elkins, LPC, ThM, MA, CSC, BCPCC, DAPA has 25 years of counseling experience and is an Adjunct Instructor at College of Biblical Studies teaching Marriage and Family courses. He is Founder and President of Christway Counseling Center P.C. specializing in marriage and family counseling. He earned a Master’s degree in Theology from Dallas Theological Seminary, and a Master’s degree in Counseling from Colorado Christian University. He was formerly on staff with Intimate Life Ministries and director of a Houston Minirth-Meier New Life Clinic. He is married to Terry Elkins and has two grown children.
Karl Elkins
Other Upcoming Opportunities
Two-Day Marriage Clinic™
The fastest way to marriage harmony! A two-day clinic to learn and experience the 25 Core Relational Life Skills. More Info »
Three-Day Accelerated Marriage Counseling (AMC)™
Includes all of the topics, instruction, and counseling projects in the Two-Day Marriage Clinic™, but is completely private—you, your partner and the counselor only. More Info »
Individual Counseling
We offer individual counseling to couples desiring an introductory session or two, follow-up sessions, or focused counseling. More Info »
FREE Marriage Builder Series
Don’t just tie the knot, but tighten the knot as you strengthen abilities to incorporate relevant and practical biblical principles in these couples’ group classes. Child care included. First Tuesday of every month (6:30-8:30pm). More Info »
Contact Information
Phone: (832) 358-0900
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